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Updated: Mar 19, 2022

We get messages all the time! Internal messages, external messages – some are validating and others can be damaging.


In a world where everyone has something to say its up to you to decide how relevant the message is. Oftentimes we get caught up in a disease to please and this confuses our ability to decide what is significant. Other times insecurity takes over and we don’t know what messages we want to give. Where to even begin….? Here’s a few tips to help you become a clearer communicator.

Message Given!

1. Who is my audience? – Will you have to change your tone, rate of speech or even the words used?

2. What is my intention? – Are you trying to provide education, pass along information, express an emotion? What are your goals in communicating this message?

3. How do you feel? – Understanding what your feeling can increase the chances of being understood by

the other person

4. Pay attention to your body. What signals is your body giving off?

Message Received!

1. Who is the message coming from? Someone you trust or someone you just met?

2. Ensure that you are clear about the intent of the message. If you are unclear ask the person for clarity: “What I heard you say was…” or “I’m not sure I understood. I took _______ from what you said.”

3. How did you feel after receiving the message? Do a self-assessment regarding your feelings.

4. You are under no obligation to respond right away. If you need to take a minute to think and process, then allow yourself that time. Be sure to let the other person know that you will get back to them and follow up when you’re ready.

These tips aren’t the end all be all of communication but it can start you on your way! Communication is the way we move through the world trying to make connections with others. It’s not always easy and there are times we make mistakes but well worth the effort.

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